She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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