New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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