im about as happy as oj after his trial
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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