# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
