Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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