She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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