I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
