In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
