somebody snuck up and got me drunk
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
