Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Randomize
