Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
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