you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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