doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
