There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
