so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
