i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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