Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
