he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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