How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
