help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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