He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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