Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
