you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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