I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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