How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
