...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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