His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
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