I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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