she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
