Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
