Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
