i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
