No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
