You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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