Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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