do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
