you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
