New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
