Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Randomize
