This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
