yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
