what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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