Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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