If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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