Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
MIDGETS
????
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
