It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize
