So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
