That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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