My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize