I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Never joke about your clitoris.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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