so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
